NO CONTINUES

I can’t watch them cry
For one more yesterday
They will find out why
Why I couldn’t stay
Rain falls to tell you
Tears in heaven dry
Screened behind the sun
Sits the last goodbye when
Paper covers rock
With words long overdue for
All that can’t be known
Can never be held true
So run into your home
And sell your faith to me
Slip it under time
To last eternally
I can’t hear them cry
It’s too obscene to dwell
The dying earth will tell them
There are no tears in hell
And what is it they seek
To dress naked conceit
Fingers crossing tight
A holy ghost appears
To scare away the night
And chase away their fears

Love’s Executioner

Shining swinging glinting, bring him to his knees
Stolen power snatching, no deafening silent pleas
Cruelty smeared in glitter, hooks the wish to submerge
Turning out of pockets, stamped buried in the dirt

Beware of false prophets, love poisons everything
It doesn’t make the world go round what does is autonomy

The world is yours to lose, all she wants is deletion
The truth will always hurt, she needs extinction as
What the eye doesn’t see the mind makes believe
You promised routine without monotony

Patent trick to bait and switch, point click, coughing vomit hold
Frozen ophaned heart embryo dies buried in the snow
Sick violation, vulture disgust feasting on the bones
Falling through a trapdoor that’s never closed below

BUNDLE OF JOY (SONG)

Get a good education son
And remember to keep your nose clean
Don’t forget ain’t no time for fun
You won’t be heard and you won’t be seen

We’ll sacrifice your dignity

All I ever want to be when I grow up was happy

Concentrate and knuckle down
Just walk away from every fight
Sit down and don’t act a clown
You’re old enough to know wrong from right

Fear programmed by fallacy

The truth appeared too criminal so the lies they told were biblical

Don’t ever get married son
I wish I was your age again
But I forgot where I belong
In the past where men were men

Your tyranny is boring me

Be careful and please take care
Don’t take drugs and just say no
It won’t make you very popular
I’m a hypocrite don’t you know?

Roped in to the family tree

Kept me safe at great expense of me having fuck all friends

The Fire Always Burns (POEM)

It was four years ago today when
I couldn’t find the words to say
Just how much I thought of you
Enough to convince you to
Want to get to know about me
Still the fire burns defiantly
On this our anniversary
Of a world we’ll never see and
A life that could have been but
Starving the flames of oxygen
Again and again and again
Couldn’t make me expire nor
Managed to put out the fire
So I’ll think of you again tonight
Four years since you set my heart alight.

THE GOOD DOCTOR

I used to have the pleasure of working with a guy about ten years older than me. I viewed him as a big brother, the big brother I never had. He accepted me despite all my shortcomings, faults and immaturity. He made me feel safe and included in the workplace. I was such an emotional mess throughout most of my working life with him and yet we shared many moments of laughter together. In the six years since I left that employer I have only seen him a handful of times. Today I bumped into him. He was jogging past literally as I was stepping onto a bus. I managed to hear him say, “It’s Mark,” as a big smile lit up his face. This made me feel very emotional as he seemed genuinely pleased to see me; and that’s not a feeling I experience very often. To be remembered with fondness is one of the greatest compliments I think I could ever be paid, but to believe that of him makes it even more special to me. For he is everything I wish I was in a man. I’m not even half of what he is. To this day I still respect and admire him. And I still tear up that I’m not in his company every day.

SOUNDTRACK TO A FUNERAL (SONG)

Thank you for your visit today
Most unwelcome but you’d know that
I see time hasn’t moved on for you
As much as it stopped for me
Yet my imposter didn’t flatter me
He was a dead give away
But you’ll never know
He dismissed you flat out

Stay hidden, don’t ever come here again
To paint my stomach with turmoil pain
Stay forgotten as my decline is storied
To rise again as you are buried

Thank you for your message today
Most unexpected but you knew that
I see you’re trying to kill me again
As much as I died before
My imposter didn’t matter to me
He was a dead weight
But you’ll never know
How I’ll cut your heart out